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Fitzroyalty - hyperlocal news and reviews about Melbourne’s first suburb: Fitzroy 3065 - is a local news site for Fitzroy residents and visitors. Read the about and hyperlocal pages for more information.

It features stories on the suburb of Fitzroy in Melbourne, Australia, and reflections on life from a socially libertarian, economically socialist, culturally anarchistic and radically individualistic point of view.

"I hate almost everything you write yet I cannot look away. You’re better than [Andrew] Bolt." User comment.

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the elite cafe society sect

I have a theory that real estate agents are secretly murder mystery novelists in disguise. A recent for auction sign on George St claimed that the studio flat in question is close to ’boutique shopping and elite Cafe Society Sect’. WTF? Is Fitzroy really home to an elite cafe society sect? A secret society of obsessives in capes that worship all day breakfasts? There are some strange shifty people around always muttering about organic, biodynamic, vegan, fair trade, etc. Perhaps these are the secret passwords. If you don’t look the part when you enter a Fitzroy cafe you may be told ‘this is a local cafe for local people; there’s nothing for you here!’

sect

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10 Responses to “the elite cafe society sect”

  1. Tim Says:

    Hehehehe your insidious sect exposed!

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  2. vetti Says:

    the obsessives walk among us – be amazed at their exhaustive instructions on how they like their eggs, and how they wish their coffee to be prepared! At least their plumage can be interesting…

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  3. Anna Says:

    Who writes that real estate crap? And why do they even bother? This is Fitzroy they’re talking about – they could be honest and write ‘Mould ridden, sinking, unrenovated slum with no kitchen, sewerage problems and countless leaks. No bathroom, but a fully functioning out-house. Potentially asbestos-ridden’ and they’d STILL get a hundred couples lining up at the auction. Gah.

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  4. brian Says:

    Quite why real estate types remain immune to spelling and grammar escapes me. Surely they can’y all be stupid and greedy?

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  5. amanda Says:

    I thought there were rumours about places like Dexter that it you don’t look the part you will be told exactly that :D

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  6. brian Says:

    Fortunately it’s not in Fitzroy!

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  7. amanda Says:

    Fitzroy, Clifton Hill… stop being such a pedant :op

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  8. brian Says:

    I mean it is easy for me to ignore because it is not around the corner!

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  9. Al Says:

    Elite Cafe Society Sect. Sounds like what I’ve been waiting for.

    I bought a cheap business shirt once, and it came with a card that read:

    “Congratulations – with the purchase of this Fine Garment you have joined the ranks of the International Fashion Elite.”

    Do you think the Sect would welcome people from the International Fashion Elite? I hope so, I wouldn’t want to be forced to choose…

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  10. brian Says:

    Yep, you’re in!

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