Remember this from August last year? I came home yesterday to find two emails, supposedly from the author of this note, which he had forwarded to me. They make no sense, and it’s easy to think he’s bonkers, but I do want to know what he’s talking about. Below are the two emails in full, but with his full name removed.

Sent: Thu, 2 September, 2010 1:45:21 PM
Subject: Stupid People

After using prostitutes to siphon school funding. The sisters of gore st, malroy and raj are out of reach.
I stood outside safeway(fitzroy) for 4 days explaining the above statement. The public were 100% grateful for being open and  honest.
If the government gives money for school funding, and this money is diverted(less a percentage) to the sisters of gore st, and this money is diverted(less a percentage) to people like raj, and this money is diverted (less a percentage) back as political donations. Is this money laundering? I and the public think it is.
If this is the way business is conducted, then tell me to shut up and stay out of it, but don’t ignore me and have people walking around making insinuations about my mental health.
Grow up, all of you.

Danny

To: Ted.Baillieu@parliament.vic.gov.au
Sent: Fri, 17 December, 2010 11:31:20 AM
Subject: Lindsay Tanner and the sisters of gore street

Mr Ted Baillieu

Dear Sir,
First let me congratulate you on rallying the virtuous people of victoria to an un-believable victory.
Now regarding my issues with the sisters of gore street. Let me briefly summerise, but in future if you wish to delve we can discuss any issue (providing you’re not delving for your friends or work colleagues for my weakest point).
Lindsay Tanner took money that wasn’t his to take. This money was laundered through the sisters of gore street, with the assistance of Raj and Mallroy.
The sisters as willing participents in the crime were willing to prove their end by providing prostitutes. The sisters in turn with a new sense of power, proceeded to turn the prostitutes on myself (no doubt for money).
We are now at a point where you can enact a law (with or without the assistance of the arch bishop), and introduce inspectors or councilors to monitor the activities of these ladies on the public.
The money will be returned by the sisters to the people. This is my hope of Olivia (lindsay tanner’s prostitute) realising the virtue of the people that she has decided to allign with.
I hope to be pleasantly surprised by your sense of right and wrong.

Yours Sincerely,
Danny

If you’re going to construct a believable conspiracy theory, proper spelling helps…